508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
are u sure the monkey wasnt drunk too
I hope you're ready because I look like an elf on crack had a baby in the medieval era and that baby grew up to be a whore
Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I think the fact that my first kiss is now in a porno says a lot about why my life is the way it is
so I made out with a lobbyist last night. im officially a resident of D.C
I wanted to take a shower but I forgot we made applesauce in it last night.
Oh I forgot to tell you that while you were in the bathroom last night I made friends with a gay man named Rodger from Venezuela and he kissed me cheek and told me I "knew how to shake my thing". From now on we go to the bathroom as a team.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
And know that if I ever text "road head?" that it comes from a place of caring and not a place of heartlessness..
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
the dude in the apartments across the street got a video of me railing blake on your front steps last night
shit like this is why i dont let you drink vodka anymore ..
Did you know they have a bouncer at Applebee's because I did not
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
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