Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
well I mean we knew we had more drinkers than runners, so we had a "case race for the cure" for relay for life instead of an actual marathon. day drinking and philanthropy. can't go wrong.
I found a tip from a dart in my bra this morning
Girl passed out in class and vomited. Another victim of syllabus week
Im so excited to get permanently banned for life from all the old bars again, it is gonna be christmas after all
Just walked into McDonald's and a bunch of fat girls gave me a look like I just entered their territory.
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
Don't mind me. My boyfriend is carrying me because I'm broken not because I'm drunk.
It's not even 9:30 yet..
You don't know scared until you've just begun the first stage of an acid trip till a guy on stilts with a creepy mustache and beard says "enter the Forrest"
No worries I have vodka. Its always on time
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
In 18 months of being married we've had sex with 7 different couples. Who said you can't have your cake and eat it.
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
So I FINALLY get to start out a story, "So there I was, naked except for a toboggan hat and handcuffs..."
Randomize
