I just farted for five sidewalk sections! New personal best.
i'm in the guys across the halls apartment. i think 7 MIP guy wants me. he just got a medical marijuana card. might be worth it.
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
i'm sober ask me anything about the civil war
everyone at work keeps looking at me like they know I got the herp this weekend
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
If we go out with the 22/23 year olds we should make t a double date. I don't want to endure the judging looks of the public as I rob the cradle alone.
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
I feel like if he almost got me pregnant once, i can at least say hi in a bar
too bad I'd hit a car before I'd hit a bush.
Are we talking about jumping from windows or your willingness to fuck a car instead of a woman?
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
What is ur current declared sexuality for my bingo board
Randomize
