Yeah go get her. And don't bring her clothes I want her to walk back in her Christmas stocking dress. Take pictures.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
After Thursday my breakup "don't screw anybody out of respect" month will be over and I will be set loose. My pussy is purring with anticipation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude i don't know we had to beg the bouncer to let us in because you were bleeding everywhere and he saw you run into a dumpster
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up the other day with my Google browser open to "DIY lip injections"... I also just received a vial of hyaluronic acid and a package of TB syringes from amazon. I'm down.
I will have no part of this.
It's almost like he's actually taking my commentary and criticism to heart, but simultaneously succumbing to some primal urge to wear less clothing each time.
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
Best part though was when he wanted to cuddle and I was like, I'm going to go.
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
One day I'm going to get tired of waking up and wondering where the glow sticks on the floor came from.
Randomize