oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Really? You have stories that rival having a threesome with the two best friends of the guy your kinda seeing? Thats impressive.
So, does it mean i'm loose if he can't even tell when he fell out?
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
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He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
did you really just refer to me me as an old fashioned penis?
He shaved off his eyebrows. This is not my life.
Just so we're clear this time around: This is dinner with my FAMILY. Not an opportunity for you to drink too much, and use the word "dick-thumpin" in casual conversation.
I feel like I just lived out a children's book called "The Day I Went to Law School Stoned"
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Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
So when he asked me to go on a date tonight, I didn't think the words "have you tried a suppository" would be part of the evening.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
She grabbed a $20 bill out of my hand, calling it a lap dance coupon and then she dragged me into her bedroom. I think I’m in love
If he moved really quickly from "hi I've had a crush on you for years" to "send nudes" you probably were used.
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