Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
Omg! I'm gonna have a heat stroke. I'm going to collect my sweat and drink it for a buzz and hydration purposes
You're welcome to join, but just to warn you, tequila makes my clothes disappear. And I'm telling you that as an adult to an adult, not as your supervising teacher who decides whether or not you graduate.
I woke up on your bathroom floor, i used your towel I found laying on the floor as a cape to get to your bed. I thought it would help me walk straight if I looked like a superhero
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
He told me "it wants a kiss" WHY HAS THIS HAPPENED WITH 2 DIFFERENT PEOPLE.
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
"I played a game called "how drunk can you get in a minute" last night. How was your Thursday?"
There's a guy running dressed as a bunny toward your house.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
You go to class with the flu but don't go when it rains... Get your shit together
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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