I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
and then she said I drew a line on her forehead with my cum and whispered "Simba"
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
Just had a stripper snatch my glasses off my face with her ass
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
I told you all we needed steroids to survive the tour de franzia, like the bikers. But nobody listened...
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
I knew it was going to be good when he took off my bra and I only realized 5 minutes later
I'm going through our high school yearbook trying to find what boys I want to hook up with this summer. We graduated four years ago. That's a problem.
We need to borrow someone's dog. Just so we can non-creepily go to PetSmart and watch all the other dogs take photos with Santa
She had a toddler. It threw up and then some guy said party foul and put it on the porch. Going back next Friday.
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
Randomize
