I just peed or puked all or around my parjibgb lot.
parking. I am not drunk
Without porn, I would have few hobbies.
I just had my first uncircumcised penis. I kept staring at it like the foreskin was going to fall off on its own.
He left the bathroom door open so i would hear him masturbate in the shower to make me feel guilty for not putting out but it just turned me on cause i like guys masturbating. weird?
You know your in college when you use the receipt from the liquor store as a bookmark
It didn't get weird until she took off her underwear, looked down, and said "fill her up!"
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
I woke up to my dog puking on my bed. Looks like it was a successful night for us all.
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
She wants to have naked weekends
They call that free range vagina in France
Call me and get me out of this conversation NOW. My coworker is talking to me about her birds having sex again...
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
i mean hes a break dancing puerto rican, how do you think the sex was?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
