I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
why does he think he needs to feed/take me out to get some ass? we are at a bar wasting my fucking time
The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
You made me pull over because you thought a leaf was a twenty rolling across the road.
classified somewhere between kinky and medically inadvisable
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
chipped my right front tooth on a toilette. i figure if i keep drinking i won't care for at least 2 days
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
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