So... how did lowering your standards work out last night?
May have just accidentally purchased an iphone on Kate's credit card. This has potential to be bad.
Hey when I die alone will you come by often enough so that my cats don’t eat my face?
captain morgan taught me last night that resee's puffs are way better when eaten straight out of the sink.
If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
you know you made out with my sister while holding Ur girlfriends hand while she was puking in the toilet right
I woke up to a head of lettuce on my nightstand, someones Honda abandoned in my yard, the cat partially shaved, and a empty bottle of sailor hanging by a scarf from the rafters. Oh, and 26 people apparently came though and rubbed my back in the process of the night. Happy 23rd to me!
not now. havin a heart to heart with drunk fred flinstone
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
I'm just gonna ride this ego train to sex town
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Does anyone remember last night? Because I still don't know why I now own a goldfish and a ceiling fan made of pizza?
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
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