He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
why is it that no matter what your novelty license plate says it always screams "im a huge tool"?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
she keeps The Day After Pill in her bra... there is a God.
You made a list of reasons why you should be on fear factor. You came up with 2 reasons: "I like fear" and "I am fear"
I just realized I have yet to puke in your new apartment. Clearly we're doing something wrong. On my way over with Cuervo as I type.
thats the 2nd threesome ive been accused of this week
You sat on my knee, like Santa, while I peed.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
I cannot believe he got soft mid fuck. I just hope he bought that horrible impression you did of my dad. I love you though, you came in clutch tonight.
It was the least I could do after throwing up in your purse.
He won't let me go to the bars unless I can manage to get flip flops on.
Sounds like he's doing this for your own good...
There's a very drunk Asian strawberry shortcake crying on the curb next to my truck. I'm not really sure what standard protocol is for this situation.
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
Like will they card me for my own whiskey in shampoo bottles?
Randomize