I think about you every night.
I'm sorry.
i finally watched harry potter... a tad unrealistic if you ask me... i mean a ginger kid with 2 friends?
oh and i'm sorry i sold you for three cigarettes last night
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Oh my god. A memory of last night just came to me. One of our neighbors joked about Thomas having a big dick and I just kept shaking my head profusely.
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
How you run into a glAss door three times in a row I do not know
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