rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
Can you return condoms to CVS?
Only if you return your pride as well.
How much explanation does bbqsexapalooza need?
It's been 5 months since I last wore a condom.
Not including when spray tanning
Don't do anything you wouldn't want to explain to paramedics
But that's half the fun of it
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
Dude, you passed out sitting straight up AND in mid sentence last night
I can't wait til I'm a real grown up and am no longer expected to take 7 shots of raspberry ruby as a pregame to a night of drinking natty lite
He literally wrote out a schedule. On it, there's a taco break, and a spot where I start crying.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
I need you to be best friend brutally honest about whether or not I can go into public like this.
Moral of the story: fuckboys never change
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
