i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
she sounds like chewbacca in bed
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Does puking on your bio final mean I can retake it?
naw. unless you want me to sit in a corner, not understand english and eat all of your cheese then i don't think it's a good idea.
Hypothetical question: how bad would bacardi be as an IV drip?
death...100% death...what r u planning.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
Thank you for calling me on to a higher level of debauchery. fuck anyone who says we aren't good for each other
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
I almost stopped mid bj to let him know I appreciated his balls being nice to look at/have my face near. But I didn't know if that would ruin, or improve the moment.
Stoned. Scared. Bring pool noodle and onion rings.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
I don't know what else to tell you.. just listen to some taylor swift and you'll know what to do in the morning
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