mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
It started with Hannah Montana and ended with alcoholism.
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
the paramedic just looked at me like "you again?"
girl I've been sleeping with this summer as per her request just gave me a carton of cigs to thank me for my "hospitality". this is good.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
It's official. This guy and I are going gay for each other. We're tasting the fucking rainbow.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
Come back I feel like I ticking time bomb of
of drugs
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
just like fucking own it. stare that cop in the eye and just keep masturbating "yeah motherfucker Im high as shit and this feels great"
Randomize