Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
Apparently he's never heard a queef, he totally thought I farted and got freaked out.
home. puking in laundry basket.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
keep it on the DL tho cause i dont want it getting out and it coming off like i kidnapped her or something
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
She said i saw her in the study room, waved, disappeared, came back with a coke from god knows where, and slurred "i have a drinking problem but i ate grits"
If it's any consolation, your boobs looked awesome.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
Right now, millions of people are waking up to get ready for work, start their day, and be productive members of society. I just found a 40 stashed in my fridge. I'm getting daybreak drunk. Zero fucks are given.
Isn't being unemployed beautiful sometimes?
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
At least Shia Labeouf would encourage me to do this drinking contest
So I just went to clothing optional bar
HOW CAN YOU EXPECT ME TO KEEP YOUR SECRETS IF YOU KEEP ON TELLING ME THEM.
Someone took a shit in the house somewhere and I STILL can't find it. I'm just going to move.
Randomize
