that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
Only I would come home from a random banging with beer and watermelon
I can't believe they didnt cut us off after we all hugged each other and started singing "were the 3 best friends that anybody could have" RIGHT IN FRONT of the bar and bartender...
Check the bible. I hear he keeps his weed in leviticus.
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
I took so my adderall all I can do is lie on my floor and stare too hard at my hedgehog. He has 42 spines in the dark spot on his shoulder btw.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I might have pissed in the corner of someone's shed. They have nice lawn mower.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
She turned down sex for beer pong. I'm not sure if I should be disappointed or not.
Dude, you were so drunk you were hanging from the ceiling of my car pretending you were a sloth while we were on 81.
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
Randomize
