kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Apparently getting drunk, buying a guitar from your local costco and walking in to an open mic night is not the same as rocking out to guitar hero...
I just remember taking her cat for a walk around 3 am then falling asleep in a slide at the park
Welp. I just hopped out of his window to avoid meeting his parents... happy monday!
Just hooked up with the fireman who put out the quesadilla fiasco last tuesday.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
It was like giving head to a cactus.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
My roommate just walked in on him eating me out ..happy finals week right?
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
I just used a box o wine to refill a bottle o wine to more effectively drunk clean
I sit across from him at graduation so I get to stare at him and think about how I fucked his step brother and laugh to myself
I watched a compilation video today of a guy banging his sex doll to edm music. I just had to tell someone.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
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