porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
If he looks like a Gremlin DO NOT get him wet.
when im bored during the day i often think, what do people who dont get high do with their day.. i came to the conlcusion that everyone must be getting high
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
Im going to hell in a hand basket. With a ribbon tied to my head. I'll be like a puppy for the devil.
We've reached the point in our fuck buddy relationship where we are playing words with friends. This is too intimate.
Just got a nosebleed, my period and the runs all at the same time. I'm either dying, or this is the first sign of the apocalypse. You warning you in case it's the latter.
I think I may have some undocumented and undiscovered std that causes girls to go bat shit crazy. How you got it is beyond me
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
Sometimes I have to make sure these messages are going to you and I'm not about to give someone in my phone book a heart attack.
I can't remember if I puked before or after the shots of absinthe. Or why I thought shots of absinthe was a good idea.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize