idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
you alive?
ya, the episode of maury where people are afraid of things are on, i had to keep livin
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
ive penciled you in for a day of excessive drinking
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
People don't tend to fuck with you when they think you have someone else's blood on your face
I, soberly, gave myself a concussion trying to take a pic of my vagina. Fuck you and your hangover.
Yeah no problem. What are blow job angels for anyways
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
I have peed in a lot of sinks
Now that I'm sober I feel the need to tell you that I'm not really a fish whisperer....
Just when I thought we may have our first low-key night together, I sang an Aladdin karaoke song to a bunch of roller derby girls, you took shots with married women, and we both fell asleep in our offices.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
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