why do cheetos always look like penises
I just used a franzia box to scrape the snow off my car.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
I kno. She bruised her chin trying to swim thru the hardwood floor.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
It looks like someone bombed the living room with his and your clothes, bra, packing peanuts, nerf gun and ammo, rc helicopter, leftover chinese food and a leather paddle.
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
Or maybe I'll just keep introducing myself like, hello, they call me iane because I need the D. Applications are submitted online, women need not apply.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That was a very uncomfortable conversation to have without pants on. But his mom was pretty cool about it.
Update: just imagined being dirty talked to in an Irish brogue and I think my vagina became a sentient being.
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
Found out the cop gives spectacular head. Don't ask. We're going out to dinner Saturday.
The first thing he said was that my underwear smelled like Trix but then he looked up at me and whispered "Silly rabbit, vagina is for me."
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
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