did you make any bad decisions?
many, i pretty much fell in love with a freshman...it doesn't get much better than that
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.
The girl behind me in psych just tapped me on my shoulder to tell me there was a condom wrapper in my hood.
I love you like a cupcake loves an overweight child, very similar to the mannerisms of a whole cake but personal, and minus the commitment issues, plus just the right amount of icing; not to mention the convenience of mobility, and only a smidgen of the guilt😘
yep you were here saturday. if you woke up smelling like vanilla i can explain.
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
I would like to dedicate my cray behavior this week to my uncontrollable hormones and wine. Both have totally Efff'ed with my life.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
When you're a bigshot ER surgeon and I'm a starving artist, I want you to remember who held your hair last night.
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
I'm suffering a hangover from deep within. I feel like the half of the parts of my body are permanently laced with alcoholic substances
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
True college students do jello shots in the library
Randomize
