So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
Scratch that. Lia's boy toy's brother has a gorilla costume. This is gonna be great.
No, I'm only going to drink half my paycheck. That's the responsible thing to do.
She has a concussion we think. Dancing to barbie girl.
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
I woke up this morning and saw that I had transferred $0.75 from my savings account to my checking account.
He was at the bottom of the stairs showering himself with the popcorn, then eating a few handfuls and running around.
he got everyone in a room, turned off the lights and started throwing knives at the wall. if you got hit, you had to drink...
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
may or may not have figured out a way to make my mom a drug mule to bring me ecstasy...
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
Too bad I can't un-pee in his body wash
These last few days with George, grandma, and now Carrie all dying have been pushing me further and further into rum's sweet embrace.
Sooooo drunk. We had the best sex ever and after he looked at me and said "That's whats up". I looked at him weird and he said "Young Jeezy would say it" and passed out on me naked. I think i might be in love
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