would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
I didn't join FB to see my only child straddle that boy in all her pictures.
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
please bring me a paper towel asap.
I was drinking wine in bed and spilt some on my chest.. And I cautiously guided it into my belly button but now I dont know what to do.
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
Threw up on the baby. National Tequila Day is the eve of National I'm A Horrible Nanny Day.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
You should just construct a mini-city, actually. Then destroy, photograph and post. Who could turn down a dick that conquered a whole city? Craigslist personals wont know what hit it.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I just ate your leftovers whilst watching Garfield and Friends. Thank you across the board.
Also I just took the BEST ass selfie of my adult life.... it's gonna be a good day haha
Would it be weird if i sent him a "happy fuckiversary" text?
Randomize
