Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
I want to walk on stilts...naked
He waited til after we had sex to tell me he had herpes... Ugh I hate being drunk
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
Is it too much to ask that I wake up one morning with out a pic of your dick as my wallpaper??
About to go get a free burrito for kissing a bald man in public
lonely sunday drunk me decided to tweeze my pubes. HORRIBLE IDEA
I tried to order champagne at IHOP last night
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
A warmed up burrito and jelly beans. The breakfast of champions.
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
A dick pic is not a proper way to say I'm sorry
He said that he had extra crunchy taquitos and wanted to go down on me.. I mean how could I say no?
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Call me a snob but I'm not banging chicks with more fingers than teeth.
Randomize