so... i had sex tonight
with a midget
nicccce tits for a little person
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
is 1am too late, or too early to make bacon?
i have at this current moment imbibed enough alcohol to float immerse or otherwise submerge a goat of respectable size. tequila
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
for a while, i completely forgot that you wrote "fuck me" on my stomach before we went out. when he took my shirt off that night, he just looked down and said, "may i?". i think i'm in love
Let's just say he sent me a picture of his dick and I was more impressed with the collection of video games he had in the background...
All I really remember is shouting "THANKS FOR LETTING ME MAKE OUT WITH YOUR GIRLFRIEND."
What can I say? You have this amazing power over straight girls.
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I can't sleep. My mind keeps asking "turn down for what?" but it won't accept any of my answers.
How fast can you get here?\nI need to ride your cock into the sunset.
What's your opinion on eating ass? Just looking for a yes or no
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
