the young, male pastor of my church has a jesus fish tramp-stamp. I made him show me.
I don't know what's more pathetic, the fact that you dated him or the fact that it took a Taylor Swift song for you to break up with him.
I just took a dump by candlelight. I feel like a pilgrim.
It was good sex. She was screaming so much I didn't know whether or not my name was Matt or God.
Just got the orientation leader spot. For the first two days, I will be one of the best looking guys on campus. The freshman girls will be so disappointed they settled for me when everyone else comes back.
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
I've done nothing but whore my gay ex bf out for the past 48 hours. It's getting weird.
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
His ass WILL be my cock's next vacation home.
I wish I had a dick so I could say shit like that.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but yours is no longer the biggest penis I've seen. It is however, still the prettiest.
But I only have 2 emotions angry and horny
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