Pregaming for shuffle board at 10 AM. I love spring break.
Woke up with two cats staring at me. One covered in puke thats giving me a look that says it might be my fault. Where am I? Come get me.
I've just never had a dinner guest strut in, go directly to my bathroom, vomit.. then come out demanding whiskey and food.
So i just got guilted into doing a tequila shot by a group of guys chanting "USA!" at me.
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
Some guy dressed like Santa just handed me a bottle of tequila. I NEVER WANT TO LEAVE CANCUN
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
Just proved I could salsa dance in a bar where no one was dancing
Sidenote...no idea how to salsa
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
It was the highest I'd ever been. I felt like a blob. A blob eating a burrito.
I may or may not of seen my high school physics teacher making out with my old high school boyfriend at the bar last night
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
Omg I'm having dinner at chilli's with a guy who is arguing that getting a weed leaf tatoo on his neck will prevent him from getting a job as a dental assistant
Well that actually sounds reasonable
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