bahahahaha i would laugh soo hard if someone did this for me hahahaha this guy would become my best friend
In these economic times, linking arms taking tequilla shots with your boss as an underage girl is the best job security I can think of
remember them days when you seriously wanted your mom to marry rev run and we would always talk shit about justine?
joeyyyy why you always taken cheeseburgers from me?!?!?!
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
vodka and carrot juice, if im gonna drink i at least got my 8 servings of vegetable
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
as soon as his mom opened the door to let me in the house she asked if i would like a shot
it's gonna be a great weekend
IS FOOTBALL GONNA SUCK HIS DICK? NO, IT IS NOT
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Im the proud new owner of the campus speed bump sign
A kid in my class today just asked if we have class on the 17th, then announced that he couldn't go anyways because it was the day after his 21 and he was going to be too hungover
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
the cops are being surprisingly chill about david hanging from a tree with no pants.
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
Randomize
