Please explain to me why I only attract Mormon guys. Just explain that to me.
I think it's God trying to counter your lustful nature. Imagine if Agnostics liked you. You'd never come out of your bedroom.
He looked at me like he has never had a girl throw up on him before.
Ok. Cause im very serious about this. I wanna strip and do coke for a month
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
Somewhere along the night we ended up at a food lion giving jello shots to high school girls.
We saluted the chips to the national anthem before cooking them. The house has to get a munchies fryer
I will no longer accept being cock blocked in my own bed.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
Captain Morgan does not know self control. Nor does he teach it.
i can believe you didnt get any, i was wing-girling the shit out of him
all you did was repeatedly scream GET IT IN
I'm soaking her vibrators in tabasco and wasabi paste. "furious" is an understatement
He told me to grab his penis so I did and swung it around and said “awe, it looks like the wacky inflatable tube man.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
Randomize
