If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
All semester I have been trying to figure out if this kid in front of me is gay. His cell phone just went off with Britney's "Circus". Case closed.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
Had a drunk dream about being in a six story taco bell. Oh my god the menu was incredibleeee
you puked on the porch, i can see your jacket on the floor next to your underwear. i know your home, unchain the door, you're the worst roommate ever.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
I should just black out in my front yard again- that was a great nights sleep.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
Six words: 3rd Degree Burn On My Dick
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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