I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
i came on her dog
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
29 Frat Parties That Got Way Too Out Of Control
My prof gave me extra credit for drawing a ninja on my paper and writing "ninja will up my grade"
You BETTER NOT STEAL MY MOTHERFUCKING SQUIRREL
Dude imagine how many pictures of dicks Obama gets. That can't be unusual. Almost every kids in the US has written the president a letter.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
15 Ridiculous Ways Broke People Managed to Make a Buck
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
we had a full conversation and he only brought up drugs twice. overall I'd call it a success
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
Not sure but if it exists I will find it and I will fill my face with it
I got very very very high last night and bought a cotton candy machine on eBay