It's like sexual therapy. We hooked up. And now were talking about our recent breakups.
Emoooo
I just googled how to quit your job and cause a big uproar at the same time....i tell you how tomorrow goes, i'm so excited....
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
Just paid a $5 cover at a bar I stumbled by so I could puke in a toilet and not in public.
Best dream ever last night. You moved here. Your Spanish name meant highway. Your favorite food was styrofoam.
I don't remember much, but my night is dated pre-Jaeger and post-Jaeger. Also, my boss may or may not have tucked me in.
Actually, what with the curvature of the Earth, it's faster to leave from Washington. And Google maps recommends kayaking instead of swimming.
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
he's the second guy to suck on my nipple in front of my friends that i haven't made out with.
I knew it was a bad night when the only thing I could remember was you force feeding me tortilla chips as I hugged the tire of my car and begged to have my stomach pumped.
We were drunk waiting for tacos and I gave him a handy in the back of the Uber while giving the driver relationship advice. I think I'm handling the whole grad school thing alright.
you told us the chicken was mocking you, then proceeded to explain that every time someone reads your mind you accidentally think of something sexual
Randomize
