Hey its my first time.
I think you mean "it's my first time"
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
No, you can still breathe under the balls.
small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
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We were sexting and at the end, instead of us having sex, he decided to put "we fell asleep in each others arms."
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
I think my vagina is going to steal my keys and drive over there.
Hopefully she would park on my face.
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
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Did strip banana grams actually happen last night
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
For reals. He's my age and he still hangs out at his frat house & gets hammered every weekend. Idk if I'm jealous of him or if I pity him
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
did you call me last night and say you were being kidnapped?
Randomize