I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
yeah, I said "hi, I'm the creepy old guy at the college bar" and she said that she like mature men, wasn't expecting that line to work
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
He has an intense fear that my cat will attack his balls while we're fucking
My only expectation is honesty. And three orgasms every time.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
I just very easily got pretty high off of one bowl of shitty dirt weed. I'm a sad excuse for who I used to be.
Lesson: Never rollerskate with a 40 in your hand unless you have a destination.
I just sugar scrubbed my vagina. If I don't get laid tonight, me and the universe are gonna have some problems.
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I found out he hated a girl that I hate so I fucked him. My reasons for fucking guys are getting bad.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
