Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His bookmark is a piece of toilet paper. No shame there.
Your boobs are like a big quesadilla marker
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
I'm working on finding a bottomless situation. Both pants and mimosas.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Because guys aren't supposed to cry. Especially when it's over a dude singing a Christmas carol.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
He started yelling terms of endearment at a cheese sandwich. Then he tried to hump it.
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
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