Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
you know you made some mistakes when your last two boyfriends are both obsessed with women's curling...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I'm not an expert but calling her the "hot lesbian" isn't going to coerce her into a 3some with you
theres a wall by my room thats like, a prime fucking wall. before i move out SOMEBODY is gonna fuck me on that wall, goddamnit.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Piecing together the sordid story from witness accounts and photographic evidence, courtesy of Fcebook. My night included Mojitos, lighting the bar on fire and declaring myself the Queen of Nerds when I stole someone's flashing tiara. Woke up this morning with a velvet cape and plastic scepter to match. Mojitos are awesome!
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
I swear to the sweet baby jesus I didn't fill your freezer with salsa and my little pony toys, but I didn't stop them either.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
I feel like my entire body is ashamed of me today
You're a god amongst men today
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