But i did once see a show where a women was homeless and installed a stove in a school bus so she and her baby could live there since all the seats were taken out. As far as being homeless goes it didn't look half bad...So this is me promising to you that if i ever am living in an abandoned school bus...i will at least pimp it out with a stove so you can come over for dinner sometimes
so i havent checked yet but im almost positive that my left ass cheek is bruised. any idea what happened last night.
what the fuck man? i was JUST texting you the same thing. FUCK
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
Im beginning to think that if I ever write an autobiography it will have to be mostly fill in the blank.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
You know you have done too many drugs when you gum the sugar off your margarita without even thinking twice
Okay so, sorry but last night we had to put a note on your chest and a key around your neck just so you would make it home.
Just thought of the perfect gift for mom.... how about not telling her about my fourth open intoxicant ticket I got last night?
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Having sex with him is like eating mayo. Don't think about it, just do it. It's worth it.
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