Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
KATE. I JUST NOTICED THAT LOWERCASE D'S LOOK LIKE SLIPPERS.
she was giving me head and that cheryl crow 'youre favorite mistake' song came on. she looks up and all i could do was nod
we were fucking and all I could think about is how my silly bands were glowing in the dark.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
And it looks like I sent you 4 failed attempts at the word "hey." Sorry about that.
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
The lady that was sitting beside me thought the best way to cheer herself up was to pet and ruffle my hair while crying and telling me her problems...
It's my day off, I'm going to Target to check out Moms in yoga pants
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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