I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
i know he has to tuck it when he gets excited in public and all, but now he is just starting to show off.
imagine if we didn have a dick. we would be so much more productive
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
In hindsight buying the pill crusher with my vicodin prescription might have been too much.
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
Apparently after taking body shots off of a guy i haven't seen since 1st grade, i ate a stick of butter, showed everyone my tampon string, and fell off the boat. my uggs belong to the sea now
I think I will be cutting those pills in half...Jesus just tried to sell me a toothbrush.
walked into class wearing my zorro costume. some girl just said "oh my god, i fucked zorro this weekend." I found her.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I feel like a pet sloth would complement my lifestyle.
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Randomize
