Make me a promise>>> if you ever see the brats from that tv show NYC Prep walking around, you will trip them, and you wil throw drinks on them
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
who dressed up as a cop at your party???
idk I have to check. Why?
he gave me the best strip search of my life. FIND HIM.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
just saw a guy snowshoeing to the liqour store
was it you?
...yes
I am not being the messenger for your booty call.
I spoon fed you cheerios when you were black out drunk. You owe me one.
I sent him this really overly apologetic text asking him out. It was just sad. Not even 27 shots of whiskey can grow me a self-esteem.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
It's like I'm getting a welcome home parade with sex!
Let's ride this possibly pregnant train together
My vagina just clenched in fear
honestly, you deserve someone taller anyways
Randomize