I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
Its only tuesday and I need a dd home from work. This is getting too easy.
I guess wearing a straight up bikini to class is an early indication that Thirsty Thursday has started.
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I woke up to find that chris drank one of my contacts.
Yeah he's good at that.
She had one of those kid princess beds. I asked how she expected to fuck on that and she just said "thats what the slide is for". I've never wanted to marry a one night stand before.
Idk. The last coherent text said something about $25 & dimes. And then...it's just letters...
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
The only person I have to bring is crazy hospital guy
HE'S NOT INVITED!!!
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
Who doesnt want to be Yoda? I mean seriously, how sweet would that be? Live to 400, not give a shit about love and all that, know fucking mind tricks and smoke awesome swamp weed. I'm down.
I just wrote a love letter to my weed and texted it to my cousin. I can't say it any differently. It happened.
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
Randomize
