I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
You told her the u were going to wrap your dick around her neck and start her like a lawn mower. thats why she left.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
That girl you went home with last night was dressed in a bright blue sweats at the bar. 205lb Smurffete FTL. Boy were you in epic form.
we're making bets on your personal life
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
He recognized me by my ass from about 15 yards away. I must have a REALLY nice ass.
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Apparently it's bring your ugly annoying ass piece of shit slob of a baby day at work
It began the way the best stories do—with some naïve jackasses in a place they had no business being at.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
He was a half hour late. His excuse was that his brother knifed him right before he was going to leave. I didn't believe him until I saw the gauze.
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