Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
I'm still hoping for it dude. Random north dakota pussy. If my 16 year old self knew that these were my dreams he would so try to beat me up, and i think he could.
If I do nothing else today, the fact that I talked you into this is achievement in itself.
Nothing wrong with a few meaningless hookups. Keeps the mind occupied and the body satisfied
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
All boys are excommunicated from my vagina until further notice.
As I walked across the lawn after the party got busted, an officer told me to chug my beer before I left the premises.
Randomize
