On valentines day I took a girl on a date that I suspect was homeless
she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
just apologized to a random stranger while waiting in line for coffee. last night was that drunk
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
we tried to steal a tractor last night. you should have come out.
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I will now send you explicit pics of mine and her genetalia bound together forever in the devils dance that is sexting.
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
THE SUN DOESNT SET TIL 647 YAAAAASSSSSSSSSS. Goodbye seasonal depression hello regular depression
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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