Hey it's Austin.
I am not drunk enough for this conversation.
She celebrated a negative pregnancy test by going out to Quizno's. I really don't understand her at all.
Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
i love him because he let me keep my UGGS on while we had sex
Fulfilled a bucket list goal last night. Borrowed a dollar from a stripper to buy smokes
God bless Atlanta.
The pee I just pissed was about 7% better than the one at your house. But both are pretty far up there.
I will read books by day and do guys by night. A mental and physical enlightenment, if you will.
So you called me the queen of nudes yesterday and I'm still not sure how I feel about it
Well I just saw a fully naked man doing a headstand in a cooler of ice water.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
I was 40 minutes late to work today because I was getting fucked. Walked in to discover that it's apparently performance review day. Employee of the year.
Having sex with him is like yoga. I do it in the morning and then can't walk for three days afterwards.
Randomize
