Why does my right nut always hang lower than my left nut?
I'm in the line at the airport trying not to vomit on the person in front of me. Happy Tuesday.
her face looked like how i feel after Taco Bell
I fucked her while she was wearing her boyfriends dogtags. I'm officially a bad american
I'm gonna need a helmet and adult supervision by 9...
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
The best revenge is living well. Or pooping in his sunroof. Either or
Do u feel more socially accepted since someone else made up their girlfriend too?
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
She complimented my boobs and then told me I smelled like teddy bears before falling asleep on the floor.
I just took the batteries out of the xbox remote so she could replace the dead ones in her vibrator If that's not love I don't know what is
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
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