Its not small because its small, Its small because it was cold outside
Not only do I have sand in my ass, but a crab pinched me while we were fucking. Still totally worth it.
Apparently she ran into the Emergency Room declaring "ROOM, PLEASE" as if she were checking herself into Holiday Inn.
dude chill. we stole 18 hamburgers from her house
no. you cant fuck a burger.
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
Do pleather leggings scream im easy on a first date?
I don't want a mention or even a whisper of a Shakespeare Festival by that or any other name including, but not limited to, a fucking Renaissance Fair. Are we clear? It will be a DEALBREAKER .
She had her pubic hair down there shaved into the superman s............. Best one night stand ever.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
I will pepper spray him so fast I don't even care
I was amazing, unlike anything he's ever experienced. I somehow made him feel young and old.and he never felt old before. He feels I will literally kill him. With my magic, lethal vagina.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
I'm gonna be late for work because i decided to masturbate and forgot to put my clothes in the dryer
However, pretty glad I spent the night puking on my car instead of fucking him. Then I'd REALLY be miserable.
Randomize
