Peanut Butter and turkey sandwich...this may come back to haunt me
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
there was enough confetti in my bra to throw another NYE party
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
So you actually don't remember giving head to the Neil Armstrong statue last night?
security doesn't like it when we pee on cars. or maybe just not theirs?
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He's texting from midnight mass asking for nude pics. Baby Jesus is spinning in his manger as we speak
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
My Sexting was not on an AP level
I'm not real sure what dinosaurs sound like, but dude, she made dinosaur noises.
There is blood all over my sheets and no discernible source.
you know you’re single when you try to cook yourself a nice pasta dinner but you’re too weak to open the container of sauce and theres no one around to help you
Randomize