You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
Just role played anchorman. And yes, I did take her to pleasure town.
just threw all of the fireworks into the bonfire. thats why there are firetrucks.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
I always "accidentally" drop a condom and make sure she sees it's a magnum. By the time I'm inside her and she realizes how small I am, it's all over in a flash and I'm done. Plus, they never call back so I never have to see the girl ever again. #gratefulforprematuretinypenis
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
i'll fuck you during the next apocalypse. promise
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The only word that describes how much hair I shaved off of my ass is "considerable".
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
You think I'll get the "I used to stick it to your daughter" discount?
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
You kept apologizing to your car for talking behind its back
Randomize