Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Who tried to make mustard cubes with the ice cube tray?
He poured all of the vodka into the sweet tea and said that tomorrow it would be called 'surprise drunk.' then we had sex.
Every single time I start thinking that we shouldn't have done that to him, I think of his ballsack in our passed out faces. No sympathy.
Sophomore year, I fucked on your desk chair. I'm sorry. I love you.
i was just offered a 40 day sex challenge. prepare for the best 40 days of your life.
oh. my. god. yes.
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
Being at this stripclub only reinforces how single I am. And I was *just* becoming okay with that.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
So I couldn't find Leif..... He fell asleep in our closet upstairs trying to get changed into warmer clothes
He's actually really cute and seems like a good guy. And given that he likes lots of drugs, he could come in handy.
After we won that round of beer pong you attempted to swallow the winning ball whole claiming you had the mouth and jaw of a snake.
A snake? I must've been gone...
After that you got naked and hissed at people the rest of the night..
they gave me money. the money smells like weed. also they gave me weed
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