dude...i just woke up in ****'s bed!
doesn't he have a girlfriend???
yeah...who do you think woke us up...
Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Threesomes are so awesome. You even have company on your walk of shame :)
he showed me his boner with his cell phone light during the movie.
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
The only way I could have failed my exam worse is if there would have been a drug test portion
i'm not accepting baked goods from anyone for awhile. especially after the stalker pie.
Just bought an airhorn. Bad things will happen.
Yup. We're now banned from TWO of our nation's finest zoos.
He is currently pregaming mini golf. MINI GOLF.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
She needs to go. She is like the Yoko Ono of our group.
i wish i could tell my students that all of their lessons plans were brought to them by captain morgan and diet coke. it's like seasame street, only for high schoolers being taught by a student teacher.
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
u would mumble something and then get unnecessarily loud and say random shit like 'id fuck the shit out of taylor hanson right now'
Randomize
